Friday Tapas: The Smelly and Aged Edition

Upon completing this week’s tapas, I realized that half of them pertain to foul-smelling subjects and the other half to me feeling old. Which makes them both smelly and aged – just like a good cheese.

Therefore, feel free to enjoy with a bold Cabernet. Cheers!

• Up until last weekend, I had three 95% empty tubes of toothpaste in my bathroom drawer. This is my version of not changing the toilet paper roll.

• Driving to work one morning this week, one of my favorite old Dave Matthews songs, “Ants Marching,” came on the radio. Naturally, I cranked it up and sang along. Until I glanced in the rear view mirror to see Lil’ Bit, brow furrowed, staring at me with an expression one might wear upon smelling an especially rancorous fart. Which, ironically, is how I approach most of Dave’s current music.

• A company that sells sump, sewage, and utility pumps started following me this week on Twitter. I find this even weirder than the time actress Carolyn Hennesy of General Hospital and Cougar Town began briefly following me before apparently realizing that I am, in fact, really very boring.

• Lil’ Bit has learned to say ‘diarrhea’ and is exercising her right to do so. Liberally. Thereby proving that there is a seedy underbelly to this wondrous thing called “language development.”

• Speaking of which, nothing makes you pause and take stock of the things you say quite like hearing a toddler repeat them back to you. This week alone, I’ve been treated to, “Oh my gosh, Boo, be quiet!” (perhaps uttered frequently at home) and, “Let’s go, people! GO!” (perhaps uttered frequently in the car). Both of which while not exactly bad, are not exactly good, either.

• Drew Barrymore celebrated her 37th birthday this week. Considering I still think of her as Gertie from E.T., this seemed shockingly old to me. Until I stopped to consider that Drew Barrymore and I are the same age and that I, too, will be 37 next week. And then I was reminded of a quote I recently saw on Pinterest:

And speaking of showing my age…

• This week, Lil’ Bit channeled The Waltons while saying goodbye to her friends at school: “G’bye, Gracie! G’bye, Elijah! G’bye, Morgan! G’bye, Gianna!” At one point, I smiled at her twentysomething teacher and said, “We’re having a Waltons moment.” She, in turn, stared blankly back at me. “You have no idea who The Waltons are, do you?” I asked. “Not a clue,” she answered. Feeling positively ancient, I sighed and told her, “Google it.”

• I’m really enjoying the Dan and Blair dynamic on Gossip Girl. Which I suppose makes me a “Dair” fan. You know – as opposed to a “Chair” fan (Chuck and Blair). The fact that this is a show for which its fans “name” their favorite couples probably definitely makes me too old to be watching it in the first place. Especially since I remember The Waltons.

And here are some share-worthy bites from the rest of the blogosphere that smell delightful but will probably make you feel like the mature, responsible adult you no doubt are:

• Ilana from Mommy Shorts took a much-anticipated ski vacation this week, only to have her daughter, Mazzy (who’s the same age as Lil’ Bit), get homesick. This post both broke my heart a little (for poor Mazzy) and struck a nerve, as I’m also still adjusting to the fact that, at two years old, Lil’ Bit isn’t just “along for the ride” anymore. She’s a little person with genuine thoughts and feelings, which she can and does express. And like Ilana, my mature, responsible self now recognizes that she deserves to be treated with the same genuine respect that Hubs and I expect from her.

• Ilana was just being mature and responsible all over the place this week as she offered both 10 Ways to Teach Your Toddler to Listen (courtesy of her sister, Dr. B) and 10 Toys to Help Princesses Master Math & Science (courtesy of Cloud at The Wandering Scientist).

• Carolyn at This Talk Ain’t Cheap brought new meaning to her blog’s name when she wrote about a truly ludicrous advertising offer she recently received. In the wake of last week’s wildly successful monetizing series in which I participated (and learned a great deal!), it’s mind-boggling from a common sense standpoint to think that some bloggers might actually accept such an offer. Bottom line? The time and work you put into your blog have significant value. Don’t sell yourself short.

• I loved this post by The Bearded Iris (via The Powder Room) about her first Mardi Gras. Not only did it bring back fond memories from my one trip to the Big Easy for the 1995 Sugar Bowl, it also brought on a flood of nostalgia for my carefree college days, when sitting around talking about life over cheap beer and dominoes felt positively thrilling. Also, I would very much like to go to New Orleans and stay with Derek’s mom and her “sisters” in a refurbished bordello in the French Quarter. What do you think, Iris – can this be arranged?

_________________________________________________________________________________________

And now I’m off to throw on some old-school DMB and wax nostalgic about the time my college boyfriend and I and 21 of our friends road-tripped to Wilmington, NC, to watch them play at an airfield, and somehow wound up spending the night in our cars at a truck stop.

Can you spot the younger, more carefree me? (Hint: I look like I should be selling grilled cheese sandwiches at a Dead show.)

And on that note, I also feel smelly and aged. Happy Weekend!

What’s on your mind?