Science According to a Three-Year-Old

It’s been firmly established that I cannot do the maths. So, it should come as no surprise that I also struggled in its academic counterpart – science.

I rocked language arts and social studies throughout school, built as they were upon a foundation of words and reading. But math and science were based on formulas and equations and the bizarre concept of numbers, letters, and symbols working together to yield a logical outcome. And my brain was not wired to make sense of such madness.

That said, my daughter recently shared with me some well-known scientific theories that made perfect sense exactly as presented. Leading me to marvel – not for the first time – at the refreshing simplicity and imagination with which toddlers view the world.

On earth science: When the moon is up, it’s dark outside and that means it’s nighttime. When the sun is up, it’s light outside and that means it’s daytime. When the sun comes up, the moon goes to sleep. And when the moon comes up, the sun goes to sleep… in the bushes.

On meteorology: The clouds start out small. But then they get big. And when they get really big, the snow comes down. But only when it’s cold; when it’s warm, it rains. And then the clouds get small again.

On botany: To grow a garden, you plant seeds in the dirt. You need to give the seeds food and water because they are very hungry and thirsty and this makes them grow big and strong. Then green beans grow out of the dirt. But the green beans turn into flowers. The flowers are all different colors; the white ones are called ‘vanilla ice cream flowers’.

On zoology: Gorillas are big. You cannot go near a gorilla because it will bite you. Gorillas do not do their best job, but they don’t have to sit in timeout. They just drink your coffee and make a big mess.

And on that note, don’t say you didn’t learn something new today.

What has your child taught you lately?